The Holidays have arrived! And I hope everyone has got their shopping done. I finished mine mid November, so I’ve had time to finish my exams and recoup on these darned crutches.
I’ve just finished a conference call with some friends with whom I get together with on the same day every year. We discussed the past year in regards to the good, the bad, what changed and what we should have changed. Then we proceed to discuss the new year. During the whole hour conversation, one woman’s main theme was a man. Her year was good because she’d had a man, now it was bad because she didn’t have a man, she changed her choices and it got her a man, what she should have changed was her changing her choices sooner so she could have gotten a man sooner. And now that she doesn’t have a man, her new year was doomed because now she had no man. So she was going to proceed into the new year with one mission: Find another man.
It was very hard to get her off this track. She couldn’t see that having a man in her life was not the be all end all. She didn’t see that the choices she’d made previously had also changed her life for the better in general. She was missing out on all the good things that were going on around her because she could only think of one thing: Getting another Man. No matter how any of us tried to steer the topic away from her goal, she was able to bring it back around on how to get another man.
When someone finally asked me what my plans for 2010 were, I made it quite clear, “I’m going to have the best year ever, whether there is a man in it or not.”
Everyone cheered except for Mission Girl.
I asked her why she was so quiet. Her reply was a fair bit in coming, “I thought your whole life was based on having a good man in your life.”
“My life is based on having a good life,” I came back. “I have a good man in it right now. But that doesn’t always mean he will be there. Life will go on, no matter what. So why should my life become less than it is just because there is no man? YOU live your life; no one else can do that for you.”
With a final Happy Yule, Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah, etc etc… we all departed from our yearly call.
It would seem my words must have had some kind of effect; I logged on to FaceBook and saw an updated wall post from Mission Girl on her site:
I’m going to have the best year ever: With or Without a Man!!!
I hope that more women will go into 2010 realizing that they are the creators of their own destinies, the writers of their own book of life. The choices they will be making for the new year will affect many of the other areas of their lives. Things will definitely happen to us that the only control we have will be the choice of how we react to that situation. I hope that everyone will choose to react in the best way possible for themselves. If a person chooses to react in a negative manner, then they have no one to turn to in blame… but themselves.
Choose to react in the most positive of ways and all good things will follow.
One small choice, one small step, it all leads to bigger and better things in life.
Happy Holidays!!!!
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